Proactive and Reactive States

Most people live in a reactive state most of the time.

We look at our email (probably first thing in the morning) and feel we must respond right away.

We have to dash to the kitchen and get the kids ready for school.

Then it's off to work, which has all manner of items that need reacting to.

We arrive back home, just in time to dash the kids off to their activities.

If we're lucky, we have a tiny bit of chill time at the end of the day. But by that point, we're so exhausted that Netflix and a glass of wine are looking pretty darn attractive.

We pass out, and repeat it all again the next day.

No wonder it's so hard for adults to learn a musical instrument, try a new hobby, start a business, or get in shape. Those things require being in a proactive state.

A proactive state meaning we're making a decision to do something, not allowing anything else to get in the way.

This isn't part of our nature anymore, and requires work to develop. Why?

School.

Whether we realize it or not, our school years prime us for a reactive state. When you think about it, almost everything a child does is a reaction to something.

Going to school and doing homework because something bad will happen if these aren't done. Heading to after-school sports because they'll be kicked off the team if a practice or game is missed.

In a child's reactive world, the proactive nature of learning a musical instrument is getting harder and harder. Kids grow up to be reactive, stressed out, and always putting off hopes and dreams.

All the more reason we need to draw the line in the sand. For ourselves and our kids. To dare to be proactive with the things we want to do. To set the time for it and let nothing else get in the way.

Even if we have to disappoint some people from time to time.

Otherwise, running from one thing to the next, putting ourselves off for everyone else, results in countless broken hopes and dreams.

And that doesn't sound fun at all.