As a parent, it’s tempting to reward kids with prizes for practicing. Getting to go somewhere. Snacks. Even toys.
As an adult, it’s tempting to do the same thing. Do an hour of good work, and you get to have a doughnut.
The problem is, the reward has nothing to do with the work.
Eventually, you’ll say, “To heck with it, I’ll just go ahead and have the doughnut.” Your kids find other ways to get what they want.
A helpful strategy is to reflect after practice or work. Specifically, asking yourself or your kids, “What felt good about doing this?” There’s always something.
Get into a rhythm, and the work starts to reap its own rewards. You get to retrain your brain to love the intrinsic rewards more than anything external.
And that is pretty cool.